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Pick-Up line or FuckedUp line

Okay, today I decided to take a brake from fashion and how we wear what we wear. Reason being that, im beginning to realise that most of us even after appearing appealing to the eyes; fine, overly dressed and with a lot of charisma

Actually do not know how to talk. And by talking I meaning having right Pick-up lines or Chyking(like my Nigeria brothers would call it). Cos frankly I think most of you wouldn't have been born if the only line Daddy used was
"You are the Sugar in my tea" which tea please? ? #thinking.
Let me pause a Sec to explain why I think so:

Did you know just about yesterday, out of the 7billion people in the world, in a corner of Uyo Nigeria there was a certain guy who told a girl
"Baby im not staring at your boobs, im only using my eyes to find a way into your heart"
Prior before now I felt like those lame pick up lines only existed in comedy movies or vocals of Okon Lagos aka Bishop (our Nigerian kevin Hart) but yesterday got me thinking in a whole new level.
I found myself at Abak road abi Aka road. Im a lil bit confused now which is which, anyways the road where you have Zenith bank close to Plaza (a location in Akwaibom state, Nigeria). I was standing by a 9mobile bus when I saw a male coper demonstrating eagerly to a girl.  She was initially smiling but when he came up with that weird line,  and all the smiles disappeared.
Just in case you don't know what pick up line means;

A pick-up line or chat-up line is a conversation opener with the intent of engaging an unfamiliar person for romance or dating.

You see its the nature of males by default that they understand women are moved by what they hear. They know this so much that they use it and over use it till they abuse it. Females do that too. Little wonder why you could find a dude telling a girl

"I hear you're looking for a STUD. Well I've got the STD and all I need is U(you) if she gives you this kibda reaction

Don't feel bad, you caused it. Im not giving you some tutorials on how to "pursue woman" #laughing but then understand that simplicity is key.  If your are good with word play fine!  But remember it's not everyone that knows "sick" could mean ill health and yet still mean "very awesome".
     Perhaps you sent this beautiful girl/guy a friend request on social media and she never responded till two months later. You forget to slide but you rush into her DM cos you so happy with your own creation, your best pick up line

"Barbie I like you, your pictures are very Sick"

Trust me she's gonna be like

Do you know why? Cos you forgot to check her profile details.  If u did you would have realised she didn't go to College which means she never understood the sick you meant and never cared to check the dictionary meaning #smiling. Well im sorry for your L.
I even wonder how you guys/girls even do that.  Add up someone and the next thing you're saying is I LOVE YOU.  How?

Before you go all
"What's your name? Or should I call mine? "
"You think im drunk? I am only intoxicated by you"
"You need to check the fabric of my shirt out, it is boyfriend material"

Uncle/Aunty calm down and access who you're talking to, how sensible what you're saying sounds. If not

Or if u don't wanna go home keep it simple or  learn to ask engaging questions. In the course of time she might end up laughing like this but lets just hope she ain't laughing at you.

9eleven still cares ♥♥♥

Comments

  1. Nini jayNovember 12, 2019 9:29 am

    Lmao.. Practice makes to perfection.. Are you our teacher on this really?? ����

    ReplyDelete
  2. rankbooster786August 25, 2020 3:43 am

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